explorerjusty (explorerjusty) wrote,

Show us Your Noobs

What luck!  This is indeed an auspicious day for my fellow Naturalists and aficionados of Mainland Wildlife!  For it turns out that I have stumbled across a sort of nature preserve, where one can observe the life-cycle of the White-Shirted Noobie in its natural habitat!


The Nerditorium, centrally located in Warmouth, was apparently set aside at the behest of Governor Linden as a Noob Preserve.  I should note that this is not a gaming preserve; it is not legal to harvest Noobies using a firearm, nor to capture White-Shirted Noobies with cages, bear-traps,  or other contrivances.


Once thought to be an endangered species, the White-Shirted Noobie has recently made a remarkable comeback.  Recent studies estimate their number in excess of some 2 million Noobies, with more being born every day!  Naturally, this raises some troubling questions.  It is not known whether the White-Shirted Noobie population can be sustained at this level indefinitely.  Some experts fear that the White-Shirted Noobie will outstrip their food supply within two years if the current trend continues.


There is also the concern that the predator-prey relationship that has long existed between the White-Shirted Noobie and some other Mainland species, such as the Flaming Forum Troll, the Spotted Snot-Nosed Griefer, or the Northwest Silver-Tongued Scammer, could result in a subsequent population explosion within these less benign species as well.  

Indeed, some have argued that this has already happened.


Rather than thinning their numbers, though, the conversationalists I spoke with seemed more committed than ever to helping the White-Shirted Noobie stake its claim in the wild.  While investigating the Preserve in Warmouth, I discovered that Mainland conversationalists were attempting to use a cheaply-produced substance called "freebies" to camouflage Noobies and provide some rudimentary protection against predation.  I have even heard descriptions of what I believe may have been some sort of captive breeding program, called "Gor."


Certainly the White-Shirted Noobie is of no interest to poachers.  Their plumage is rough and unattractive, and their meat is bland and grainy.  While they can be taught to speak or used as pack animals for building, most of the time you just end up with lots of questions in the case of the former, and giant plywood cubes in the case of the latter.  Nevertheless, the White-Shirted Noobie is quite a gentle beast and is easily domesticated.  

Overall, the prospects for the White-Shirted Noobie can be considered quite good. 
Students of Naturalism and the Environment are advised to head to Warmouth if they desire to observe the White-Shirted Noobie in its natural habitat.

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